Kid-isms from the last month

Obviously I am about a month behind on updates, kid-isms, and parenting anomalies  SO, in no particular order....

Crazy. Just Crazy.

My children will commandeer and destroy boxes as fast as I can make them. They turn into rocket ships, boats, and hovercraft the second they are put in the house. When I say packing, sorting, and purging makes my kids crazy, I am not kidding. They have lost their ever-loving minds 

For example, this is what Kendal looked like when I brought boxes in to pack her books and stuffed animals. Whoa.

Caution!

Yesterday Logan dusted some stuff for me as we were boxing it up. This means the wood floor where he was working is REALLY slippery. Kendal keeps falling down on it. She just came and said "man! I got issues with this mom. You gotta do something"

Other peoples' kids

"Ethan, go stand by that Lego Knight! Yeah just like that. Wait, NO!"

Its ok Ethan I never know what to do with my hands for pictures either. LEGO man is startled by your solution to this age old problem.









These are the social networking conversations I get to look forward to? Awesome.
Kenzie: "They're the rings that go in my nose, but it'd look good in your ear!"
Seriously? WTF?

Spelling lessons

Logan: When we get home from dinner can we have some C.A.K.E.?
Loopy: Bacon?
c.a.k.e. spells BACON (around here anyway)

What an adorable crazy person you have!

When Kendal sneezes and no one is around she says "Bless you, little me."

"She's so cute" you say... well she just headbutted Loopy's computer monitor because Dora kept asking the same question over and over. Her cuteness appears to be bi-polar.

again..

So Kendal just jumped on Logan and smacked him across the face for no reason.
WTH 3yr old?

Win

Today Kendal proved that she IS paying attention. She started to say random words and tell me what letter they start with and what sound they make. Until now she has been acting like the concept of English is beyond comprehension.

Fail

Today Logan proved that he is a distracted, ridiculous 6 yr old by pretending he couldn't find him mouth at dinner, forgot where his bedroom was located, and how to turn left to avoid doorjams. You can't win em all I suppose.

More violence

When Kendal says "You need a huuuuug?" say no. She is imitating Bear Hugger from the Punchout game Logan and Loopy have been playing. She also has a good left hook. Ouch.

Sharing isn't always ok

Got up this morning and threw on Loopy's Ren and Stimpy shirt to take Logan to school. Kendal told me its DAD'S shirt and I need to take it off before he finds out. She got pretty persistent and tried to take it off me. She finally got up to get me a different shirt, standing there with her hands on her hips until I changed. Loopy came in and told her its ok, he'll share. She told him there are some things we just DON'T share.

Later that night Loopy noticed this....

I've got some red sweats, you've got some black sweats, 

then we switch it up, we've got Christmas/ Kwanza sweats!

The video I'm referring to is in that post... somewhere, watch it, its awesome.

Breakfast and lunch dates Galore!

Breakfast with the ladies at the Beanery

(Me, Kendal, Claire, Brenda)

Lunch with Luci and Misty at Olive Garden

Lunch with Marty, I think Kendal is a little much for him!








Lunch and a walk with Adriana

Mexican food and Cake Pops with Carol Ann

Breakfast with my girl and Davida at Starbucks 

Playdates!

Kendal and Mia

Nick and James Dean

Kendal and her SUPER best friend Carol Ann

My friends are awesome because they got me a cheesecake. They are even more awesome for posting this picture on facebook. I have no shame so I'll put it here.

Logan and Raven (Nissa's Dog)













Kendal and Tatum

There are MANY MORE but we need to move on

More moving crazies!

These kids are running like crazy wild animals through the house. Kendal just ran in the house.. to hand Loopy the scissors in her hand then hid under this box that she emptied on the floor

Logan thought it was a great idea so he emptied this laundry basket for me so he could hit under it. 

Stress.

I am incredibly grumpy. I am having NO fracking patience for electrics that aren't working, 3yr olds melting down for no reason, 6yr olds questioning authority, and just general afternoon aggravation. I would like to take a nap or get drunk.

Here are some cute things my kids said that day to keep me from completely losing my shit.

Kendal: The tv has letters! I'll spell them out for you. P.H.I.L.I.P.S. That spells TV!!

Logan (in whiny speak): Moooom, I need some Tylenol NOOooow!
Me: Ok, why?
Logan: When I have to go to the bathroooom my head hurrrts
Me: Well that's just weird.
Logan: I knoooww, but its only in he afternooooon.

Then they played nicely outside for a couple hours and hugged a lot.

Father/Son bonding

The boys went to a race together. 

Me and Kendal stayed home

It was cold. 

I hate NASCAR

Kendal-ism

Grandpa: I'm coming over for your birthday!!

Kendal: Can I be 17 next? 

Me: No. No you can't.

Logan-Logic

Me and Logan just had a rather serious discussion about what to do if you come across someone in a desert and their brains have fallen out of their head. I recommended 911. He pointed out there is no phones in the desert and cell service would suck. I told him there is really nothing you can do for that person. He asked if he should try to put the brain back IN and wonders what that would feel like. He just walked away like like this is something to ponder for a while.

Ode a hero

Dr. Suess day for Logan's class. He is thing 10.

Some days I don't like having a 3yr old.

I am not sure what the hell is going on with this kid. Kendal is like an angry cat who pees on stuff when you are packing to go on vacation. Seriously. She peed on the newly steam cleaned carpet and living room floor. Those are just the puddles I have found! She is refusing to eat anything but chips and gummies. She picked out expensive ass vegan chicken nuggets at Publix and refused to eat a single bite. Its just been a rough day. Oh, and I cleaned up for the landlord to show the house. Turned around and she had emptied a box I just got done packing.. you know the one with ALL the puzzles, 50 foamy blocks and other messy stuff that take a long time to put away.

Redemption 

Today I liked having a 3yr old again. She was SO good while I was outside all day for the garage sale. She enjoyed having the house to herself. Watching Netflix, eating cereal out of the box, pantsless while playing with her elephants. She came out a couple times to play with Melanie and take toys from Amber. Here's hoping the Survivors Moving Sale is profitable again tomorrow! *note to self, wear sunscreen. 

Today's garage sale tally.

30 cars up and down the street before 9am

1 guy took a plastic bottle out of the recycle bin to relieve himself. (thankfully he left in his truck first)

1 crazy cat woman who rang by door bell all morning and was mad that my friends weren't here to open early. And also upset that I didn't know whether or not they are bringing a cat tree.

1 guy with a fanny pack that wore out his welcome about an hour before he left. 

2 people offering $1 for EVERYTHING

1 missing piece of crappy costume jewelry

$60 made

3 pretty sunburned 'Survivors

Kool-aid stand is open

Issues

Kendal: Lets listen to the "No" song (they might be giants)

Me: Ok, (accidently put on "robot parade" which skips)

Kendal: Oh man, not this one Mom. It has some issues

Poor Pluto

Logan is dressed as an astronaut watching the Neil Degrasse documentary on Pluto. I freakin' love Colbert and John Stewart's take on the subject. Here's a video from you tube. There are many and they are awesome.

Put on yer biker costume!

Headed out for steak n taters! Bike week with Chris and Beth is my favorite. Excited to go riding.

Like having a college kid...

When Logan has to pee in the middle of the night its like watching a really drunk guy who can't find the bathroom. His eyes look wide and alert but you can just tell he has NO idea why he is in the living room. He gets defensive when you direct him to the restroom and he might need assistance when he gets there.

Shopping with elephants

Finding fun

As an added bonus, Mom gets a free energy drink. Monster for the win.

Unreasonable.

I found myself having a heated argument with Kendal about whether or not pigs have trunks. I say snout but she thinks I made the word up. She isn't budging on this and has put her bug eyed, long snouted pig in the elephant lineup for the day. It is a 'stress pig' that has eyes that pop out when you squeeze him. She won't let me squeeze it because it hurts him. (Thanks Carol) 

Done.

So. tired. This is after she fell off the couch and got back up still snoring away. 

We need a break!

Every day for the last 2 months we've had a list of things to accomplish. Even if its stuff stuff like visiting with friends for coffee, lunch, or a walk. We are BOTH worn out from days of packing and cleaning and sorting and garage sailing and more packing and playing and organizing and coordinating. Next week I think we are gonna try to take some time off from the whirlwind of play dates and coffee breaks. I know its our last week but that means crunch time! 

I'm not holding my breath though. We like adventures!!