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Friday, September 20, 2013



Ok, So I asked on Facebook what blog readers would like to hear me talk about. I thought maybe I'd get a few replies because as soon as I post a blog (then link to my facebook page) the blog itself gets around 60 hits by noon the next day. SOMEONE is reading along. Or at the very least there are some creepers that scan to make sure I'm not talking shit about them on a public forum. I do that sometimes. But rarely name names. And I also do it out of spite and/or for my own amusement because sometimes passive aggression is fun. I digress.

My friend Sarah had a suggestion, and since she's the first (and so far only) one to respond I'll go with her request. By the way, I've known Sarah since HomeEc in Jr. High. I sort of wish I had a picture of us together back then in all of our awkward Jr. High glory. Her wearing a stunning handmade vest and me with a stuffed dog sewn directly to my middle finger. Seriously, that shit hurt. Anyway, she suggested I write about myself.

I am clearly not good at this particular subject matter. I can make a witty comment or relate to anyone else's story, status, or text. I can write an entire years worth of blogs and stories about my kids, my husband, my family, my friends and their stories.. But me. uh... um..

Ok, lets do this.

What makes us, us?

I believe that every person is who they will be from a very young age. Your heart, your mind, your personality, your character itself is created and becoming defined when you are like 2yrs old. I believe that how you will view life and how you will react to situations is the same when you are in preschool as when you are as an adult. Whether you had a great childhood in a regular middle class family like I was blessed with or a horrific abused childhood. HOW you deal with things remains the same. I'm willing to debate that if you disagree. I like hearing people's opinions. 
That being said.  Here a rough synopsis of how I became "Me." 

[edit: I accidentally wrote my life story, then moved that to the blog in progress section. Maybe I'll put that in a different post. Its way more in depth than I intended.] 
[edit to the edit: My laptop battery died and my life story got deleted. Coulda sworn I hit save. Son of a....]

Me. The shorter than life story version.

I am Kara. 
Pronounced Kar-uh not Care-uh
Photo cred to SG Doomed Photography
I am an extremely compassionate person. My friends and family mean the world to me. If someone is upset I am the first to offer advice or just listen. I enjoy helping people work through problems because I genuinly want the people I care about to be happy, or at the very least content. 
  1. 1.
    feeling or showing sympathy and concern for others.

*Disclaimer: I am not a fan of drama. If your issue is self created drama and gossip I probably DON'T want to hear about that and I will only offer the advice of "Knock that shit off." or something similar.

You should probably know that I am very blunt. I am not a fan of beating around the bush. The only problem I have with this trait is that sometimes I come across more harsh than I mean to be. I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings, I just want to get my point across without arguing or getting off subject. 

  1. 1.
    (of a person or remark) uncompromisingly forthright.

Same thing as being sarcastic. I'd like to call it bluntly witty, but that hasn't caught on yet. Somewhere in the English language the definition of "witty" and "sarcasm" got confused. So lets define these words so you can understand where I'm going with this. 
  1. 1.
    showing or characterized by quick and inventive verbal humor
    "a witty remark"
  1. 1.
    marked by or given to using irony in order to mock or convey contempt.
    "sarcastic comments on their failures"

Anyone who knows me is aware of  my "wit" but it is often labeled as "sarcasm" The difference is my intention. I am rarely meaning to "convey contempt at a person's failure". I am merely being bluntly witty about a situation. But often it comes across as sarcastic rather than witty. I don't mean it that way. Calling myself witty sounds more like a compliment to myself than I am comfortable with. Who wouldn't want to have quick inventive humor? I've heard that sarcasm is the lowest form of wit, (thanks for that nugget of wisdom, Dr. Phil) but I quite disagree. Sarcasm and wit are completely different and the labels in society are back-ass-wards. According to popular vote, I am sarcastic. Nope, turns out I am indeed witty, you just had the definition wrong.. (See what I did there? I'm not insulting anyone personally.. just making a witty observation)  Moving on

I am a wife and stay at home mom. I've had LOTS of jobs requiring different skills. I've been a technician for AT&T, I've been a Barista, I have been an insurance agent,  I've worked in several days cares, I have been a gas station attendant... I liked all of these jobs for different reasons. 

This is by far my favorite job to date. You all come here and read about my joys and frustration at this particular job. The joys far outweigh the frustration. I make jokes and shake my head and laugh at the antics and misbehaving kids because without a sense of humor I would miss out on the fun of being the mom of two kids that are indeed hilarious. 

Also, I suck at math, so becoming an accountant was RIGHT out.

Before we got married Loopy wasn't so sure he wanted to be a dad. I knew I'd marry this guy in a heartbeat as soon as we started dating but not being a mother was not an option for me. I made that quite clear. Up until I was pregnant with Logan he wasn't sure he wanted to be a dad and I just hoped he'd get used to it because this has always been a part of who I am. It turns out he's a GREAT dad and parenting buddy. I sort of knew he would be. 

I am the calm in the storm. 

I am able to handle stressful situations ridiculously well. I'm not referring to the type of stress that makes mom lose her shit when kids are not listening, the house is trashed, and I'm out of coffee. 

I mean when there is an emergency. If everyone is panicking, a friend is having a breakdown, in the hospital, or bleeding out, I am the level headed voice of reason. If you need some one to talk you down, I'm the guy. If you need a lift to the hospital and are scared or recently diagnosed with something awful, I'll be there.

Along those same lines. I'd like to think I am a good friend. There are very few times when I put myself before someone who needed me. Sometimes its just a coffee talk, sometimes a good amount of drinking or just chatting online. I try to keep contact with people I care about. Maybe not as often as I should, but those that have known me the longest know that I'm reliable enough to be there in a pinch regardless of how much time has passed or how many miles are in the way.

Here is a picture taken last summer of me and Caitlyn. We've been friends for about 25 years. And we've been through some shit together.

This is me and my friend April about 16 years ago. She's one that I would (and have) done almost anything for. Oh the stories I could tell...

I don't have a picture of  just me and my buddy Joe together, but this is from one particularly amazing emergency room visit we had. Joe is my #1 coffee buddy. Not many can hang with us until the sun comes up.. (except April) doesn't matter if its a sunrise over the Atlantic or Lake Michigan..

Oh, here's one of me, Joe, and Brad during bike week. I was pregnant with a kid. I don't remember what year this was from. Brad is pretty awesome too. And he takes me for rides on his bike, which is equally as awesome.

There are too many amazing friends to list and post pictures of everyone.

I sort of panic if I think a friend is drifting away. I find myself clinging to the hope of staying close and I might even lose sleep over wondering what I did wrong. Distance happens and friends come and go. I'm not ok with that. In my ideal world there would be no misunderstandings or stress between friends. I am a very social creature and need interaction. Some people can just be alone and ok with that. Not me. There is always FB messages, text messages, phone calls going on around here. No time is a bad time to make contact with me.

I don't typically care what people think of me. Sure, everyone wants to be liked, everyone wants to be accepted. I am not a judgmental person at all. Being judgey usually leads to drama which is something I don't like or have time for. Therefore if someone doesn't like me or thinks I am too sarcastic or weird, that's fine. They should take more time to get to know me or just move on.

Now if a person I care about has a negative opinion of me I like to know. I am all for constructive criticism and open conversation. I am probably missing the friendship anyway. Communication is essential but it has to go both ways.

I love people. I love learning about people and WHY they are who they are. I like to know about a person's past, how they feel about any given subject and why. People tell me things. Private things, important things, secrets.. I love that. Not because I am nosy and want to spread everyone's business. I love it because it's insight. I love it because people trust me enough to tell me things. Sometimes this comes from friends but I've also had complete strangers sit with me and just start talking about what's going on in their lives, hopes and dreams. I love every moment of it because I love people and the psychology behind them.

I've joked about opening a psychology office for people who don't like doctors. I took psych and sociology classes in college but dropped out before I graduated. Therefore I learned how to talk and listen to people. I can dredge up deep dark secrets but... I don't know how to fix them. But I'll try. I'll listen, I'll give advice. I'll work for coffee and friendship. If there is a problem or subject anyone wants to discuss I've probably heard a similar story and if not I've read about it. I read Psych books in my spare time. I love the subject THAT much. Weird, huh?

One of my biggest pet peeves is when grown ass people refuse to be open minded. There are lots of things in the world to be passionate about. My thing is people. Humanitarian stuff, psych stuff, helping, reaching out, being there. I think that just because someone has a different view than yourself doesn't mean they are wrong. It just means they view it differently. Some people are passionate about politics, or socialized medicine, or being vegan, or a particular parenting style, equality, religion.. the list goes on and on. Just because a person isn't passionate about what you are passionate about does not mean they are apathetic to the situation. It's just not what strikes a cord and gets them fired up. Grown ups should be able to have intelligent conversations rather than bickering matches with a complete refusal to see the other side of the coin. You don't have to back down in your beliefs, just accept that there are others out there. And that's ok.

And that is me in a nutshell. 

I am quite done talking about myself. If there is anything else you want to know, just ask. If there is something you want to say, agree or disagree with what I wrote then lets here it. But for now, I'm sick of hearing about myself and looking at myself! 
Here are some random pictures of me. I don't usually have pictures of JUST me in the blog. So enjoy, it proabably won't happen again! 
professional photo cred goes to Innovative Eyes Photography, SG photography, and Chris Mills Photography

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