Me.

Crap

Ok, So I asked on Facebook what blog readers would like to hear me talk about. I thought maybe I'd get a few replies because as soon as I post a blog (then link to my facebook page) the blog itself gets around 60 hits by noon the next day. SOMEONE is reading along. Or at the very least there are some creepers that scan to make sure I'm not talking shit about them on a public forum. I do that sometimes. But rarely name names. And I also do it out of spite and/or for my own amusement because sometimes passive aggression is fun. I digress.

My friend Sarah had a suggestion, and since she's the first (and so far only) one to respond I'll go with her request. By the way, I've known Sarah since HomeEc in Jr. High. I sort of wish I had a picture of us together back then in all of our awkward Jr. High glory. Her wearing a stunning handmade vest and me with a stuffed dog sewn directly to my middle finger. Seriously, that shit hurt. Anyway, she suggested I write about myself.

I am clearly not good at this particular subject matter. I can make a witty comment or relate to anyone else's story, status, or text. I can write an entire years worth of blogs and stories about my kids, my husband, my family, my friends and their stories.. But me. uh... um..

Ok, lets do this.

What makes us, us?

I believe that every person is who they will be from a very young age. Your heart, your mind, your personality, your character itself is created and becoming defined when you are like 2yrs old. I believe that how you will view life and how you will react to situations is the same when you are in preschool as when you are as an adult. Whether you had a great childhood in a regular middle class family like I was blessed with or a horrific abused childhood. HOW you deal with things remains the same. I'm willing to debate that if you disagree. I like hearing people's opinions. 

That being said.  Here a rough synopsis of how I became "Me." 

[edit: I accidentally wrote my life story, then moved that to the blog in progress section. Maybe I'll put that in a different post. Its way more in depth than I intended.] 
[edit to the edit: My laptop battery died and my life story got deleted. Coulda sworn I hit save. Son of a....]

Me. The shorter than life story version.

I am Kara. 

Pronounced Kar-uh not Care-uh

Photo cred to SG Doomed Photography

I am an extremely compassionate person. My friends and family mean the world to me. If someone is upset I am the first to offer advice or just listen. I enjoy helping people work through problems because I genuinly want the people I care about to be happy, or at the very least content. 

com·pas·sion·ate

kəmˈpaSHənət/

adjective

1. 1.

   feeling or showing sympathy and concern for others.

*Disclaimer: I am not a fan of drama. If your issue is self created drama and gossip I probably DON'T want to hear about that and I will only offer the advice of "Knock that shit off." or something similar.

You should probably know that I am very blunt. I am not a fan of beating around the bush. The only problem I have with this trait is that sometimes I come across more harsh than I mean to be. I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings, I just want to get my point across without arguing or getting off subject. 

blunt

blənt/

adjective

2. 1.

   (of a person or remark) uncompromisingly forthright.

Same thing as being sarcastic. I'd like to call it bluntly witty, but that hasn't caught on yet. Somewhere in the English language the definition of "witty" and "sarcasm" got confused. So lets define these words so you can understand where I'm going with this. 

wit·ty

ˈwitē/

adjective

1. 1.

   showing or characterized by quick and inventive verbal humor

   "a witty remark"

sar·cas·tic

särˈkastik/

adjective

1. 1.

   marked by or given to using irony in order to mock or convey contempt.

   "sarcastic comments on their failures"

   
   

Anyone who knows me is aware of  my "wit" but it is often labeled as "sarcasm" The difference is my intention. I am rarely meaning to "convey contempt at a person's failure". I am merely being bluntly witty about a situation. But often it comes across as sarcastic rather than witty. I don't mean it that way. Calling myself witty sounds more like a compliment to myself than I am comfortable with. Who wouldn't want to have quick inventive humor? I've heard that sarcasm is the lowest form of wit, (thanks for that nugget of wisdom, Dr. Phil) but I quite disagree. Sarcasm and wit are completely different and the labels in society are back-ass-wards. According to popular vote, I am sarcastic. Nope, turns out I am indeed witty, you just had the definition wrong.. (See what I did there? I'm not insulting anyone personally.. just making a witty observation)  Moving on

I am a wife and stay at home mom. I've had LOTS of jobs requiring different skills. I've been a technician for AT&T, I've been a Barista, I have been an insurance agent,  I've worked in several days cares, I have been a gas station attendant... I liked all of these jobs for different reasons. 

This is by far my favorite job to date. You all come here and read about my joys and frustration at this particular job. The joys far outweigh the frustration. I make jokes and shake my head and laugh at the antics and misbehaving kids because without a sense of humor I would miss out on the fun of being the mom of two kids that are indeed hilarious. 

Also, I suck at math, so becoming an accountant was RIGHT out.

Before we got married Loopy wasn't so sure he wanted to be a dad. I knew I'd marry this guy in a heartbeat as soon as we started dating but not being a mother was not an option for me. I made that quite clear. Up until I was pregnant with Logan he wasn't sure he wanted to be a dad and I just hoped he'd get used to it because this has always been a part of who I am. It turns out he's a GREAT dad and parenting buddy. I sort of knew he would be. 

I am the calm in the storm. 

I am able to handle stressful situations ridiculously well. I'm not referring to the type of stress that makes mom lose her shit when kids are not listening, the house is trashed, and I'm out of coffee. 

I mean when there is an emergency. If everyone is panicking, a friend is having a breakdown, in the hospital, or bleeding out, I am the level headed voice of reason. If you need some one to talk you down, I'm the guy. If you need a lift to the hospital and are scared or recently diagnosed with something awful, I'll be there.

Along those same lines. I'd like to think I am a good friend. There are very few times when I put myself before someone who needed me. Sometimes its just a coffee talk, sometimes a good amount of drinking or just chatting online. I try to keep contact with people I care about. Maybe not as often as I should, but those that have known me the longest know that I'm reliable enough to be there in a pinch regardless of how much time has passed or how many miles are in the way.

Here is a picture taken last summer of me and Caitlyn. We've been friends for about 25 years. And we've been through some shit together.













This is me and my friend April about 16 years ago. She's one that I would (and have) done almost anything for. Oh the stories I could tell...






I don't have a picture of  just me and my buddy Joe together, but this is from one particularly amazing emergency room visit we had. Joe is my #1 coffee buddy. Not many can hang with us until the sun comes up.. (except April) doesn't matter if its a sunrise over the Atlantic or Lake Michigan..






Oh, here's one of me, Joe, and Brad during bike week. I was pregnant with a kid. I don't remember what year this was from. Brad is pretty awesome too. And he takes me for rides on his bike, which is equally as awesome.

There are too many amazing friends to list and post pictures of everyone.

I sort of panic if I think a friend is drifting away. I find myself clinging to the hope of staying close and I might even lose sleep over wondering what I did wrong. Distance happens and friends come and go. I'm not ok with that. In my ideal world there would be no misunderstandings or stress between friends. I am a very social creature and need interaction. Some people can just be alone and ok with that. Not me. There is always FB messages, text messages, phone calls going on around here. No time is a bad time to make contact with me.

I don't typically care what people think of me. Sure, everyone wants to be liked, everyone wants to be accepted. I am not a judgmental person at all. Being judgey usually leads to drama which is something I don't like or have time for. Therefore if someone doesn't like me or thinks I am too sarcastic or weird, that's fine. They should take more time to get to know me or just move on.

Now if a person I care about has a negative opinion of me I like to know. I am all for constructive criticism and open conversation. I am probably missing the friendship anyway. Communication is essential but it has to go both ways.

I love people. I love learning about people and WHY they are who they are. I like to know about a person's past, how they feel about any given subject and why. People tell me things. Private things, important things, secrets.. I love that. Not because I am nosy and want to spread everyone's business. I love it because it's insight. I love it because people trust me enough to tell me things. Sometimes this comes from friends but I've also had complete strangers sit with me and just start talking about what's going on in their lives, hopes and dreams. I love every moment of it because I love people and the psychology behind them.


I've joked about opening a psychology office for people who don't like doctors. I took psych and sociology classes in college but dropped out before I graduated. Therefore I learned how to talk and listen to people. I can dredge up deep dark secrets but... I don't know how to fix them. But I'll try. I'll listen, I'll give advice. I'll work for coffee and friendship. If there is a problem or subject anyone wants to discuss I've probably heard a similar story and if not I've read about it. I read Psych books in my spare time. I love the subject THAT much. Weird, huh?

One of my biggest pet peeves is when grown ass people refuse to be open minded. There are lots of things in the world to be passionate about. My thing is people. Humanitarian stuff, psych stuff, helping, reaching out, being there. I think that just because someone has a different view than yourself doesn't mean they are wrong. It just means they view it differently. Some people are passionate about politics, or socialized medicine, or being vegan, or a particular parenting style, equality, religion.. the list goes on and on. Just because a person isn't passionate about what you are passionate about does not mean they are apathetic to the situation. It's just not what strikes a cord and gets them fired up. Grown ups should be able to have intelligent conversations rather than bickering matches with a complete refusal to see the other side of the coin. You don't have to back down in your beliefs, just accept that there are others out there. And that's ok.

And that is me in a nutshell. 

I am quite done talking about myself. If there is anything else you want to know, just ask. If there is something you want to say, agree or disagree with what I wrote then lets here it. But for now, I'm sick of hearing about myself and looking at myself! 

Here are some random pictures of me. I don't usually have pictures of JUST me in the blog. So enjoy, it proabably won't happen again! 

professional photo cred goes to Innovative Eyes Photography, SG photography, and Chris Mills Photography

The Other Most Wonderful Time of the Year!!

*Hard to top*

11 Years ago today I went on a date with my boyfriend. By the end of the date he was my fiance' by the end of the month he was my husband and we lived in a new state. August is my favorite. Good things always happen in August.

*Sean time*

One of Logan's best buddies from Palm Coast is Sean. He came to stay with us for a few days in July and I forgot to add the pictures and such. My bad.

As soon as he walked in our door... 

Kendal: Well hello there boyfriend. I like it that you are here.. 

Sean: Um.. Hi Kendal.. /eyeroll 

Logan: Kendal, really?

*The Bedtime Incident*

So let me tell you a little story about the time I nearly freaked the frack out. 

A couple days before Sean came over I reminded Logan that his best friend is coming for a few days. He said he doesn't want Sean here. And he also never wants to spend the night at Sean's house. ever. again. I asked why, he said he doesn't want to talk about it. Ok... I let it slide thinking he was just in a mood. 

Whatchu talkin' bout Willis?

The next day I casually inquired about why he was so adamant about this. He said, and I quote, "Because of the bedtime incident. I just don't want to talk about it."




My mom sirens went off and I started to panic. The word 'incident' is more alarming than 'accident' or disagreement' or any other freakin' word in the english language. Particularly preceded by 'bedtime'. I was about to pick up the phone raise holy hell with one of my best friends. Instead I calmly said "ok" and dropped the subject. I could not wrap my brain around ANYTHING requiring such a strong description happening at this friend's house. 

The next night I told him it was really bothering me and I needed to know more about why he won't be friends with Sean anymore. He wasn't interested in having the conversation and I promised that I'll keep his secret and I would take care of whatever the problem was. After about 20mins of prying I got the real story.

Some time ago (could have been weeks or months, who knows) Adriana had taken my kids for the night so me and Loopy could go do grown up things. Since I trust her with my children's lives and there has NEVER been an issue we gave hugs and kisses and went on our merry way. At bedtime Logan and Sean were talking and being silly and Logan said he called Sean a N.E.R.D (he spelled it like that when he told me this story) Now, at our house, Nerd isn't a bad word. Nerds are smart, they typically earn more money than non nerds, they understand complex things, they like to read, ect...  Sean probably answered a math question correctly or something. Anyway, Sean was really upset but pretended to be thirsty and said he needed something to drink. Logan said "don't tell on me, ok?" Sean said "ok" and left the room. He DID tell his mom what Logan said. (according to new and improved bully rules, that is the right thing to do) Adriana went into the room, told Logan that isn't nice and we don't call names in this house yadda yadda yadda. She handled it correctly and the same as I would have. Logan was pretending to be asleep but obviously was not. He was just embarrassed for being in trouble. 

My mouth dropped. I was like wait, Lemme get this strait. You called Sean a name that hurt his feelings, He told his mom, and You are mad that you got in trouble? He said he's mad because Sean lied to him about getting milk and tattled when he said he wouldn't.

That is all the "Bedtime Incident" was about?! I calmly told him Sean did the right thing. Adriana did the right thing and Nerd is often a derogatory word that can hurt someones feelings. He insists he didn't know that. I asked him if next time something like that happens can we please come up with a different name for the disagreement? Then I very vaguely explained things that would qualify as an actual "bedtime incident". 

THEN I contacted Adriana who was just as mortified as I was at the outlandish possibilities, scenarios and feelings that a parent would feel at a terrible alternative to what actually went down. Her recollection of said incident was identical to Logan's. She said I should have talked to her but understood that I wanted to get Logan's story first. 

I did let her know that if I thought for a second there was something more serious going on or that someone had molested or hurt my children in ANY way I would be a raving lunatic on her doorstep. With Weapons. There would be no phone call. She agreed that would be justified.

We both agreed that this will go down in history as 

The Worst Name For a Childhood Argument in the History of EVER.

The End.

*How WE re-purpose things*

Sometimes my laundry basket is used to transport Kendal and all her animals around the house. 

*My bad*

Thought I had a super productive day. Loopy worked from home, I fed kids at recommended times, folded laundry, did dishes, made it to a Dr. Appt on time, brought Kendal's old clothes to Once Upon a Child and did some shopping for me.. I keep feeling like I forgot something. Karate. I forgot to take Logan to Karate. Oops. Maybe next week.

*Poor music stand*

Mic stand had a little accident while I was out getting groceries and need Dr. Kendal to fix it up. Noone will tell me what happened though. I probably don't want to know.

*Bedtime Battles*

Kendal, standing at the top of the stairs: Mom, I dropped my water.
Me: ok, pick it up.
Kendal: I can't, I have to stay in bed.
Me: You came out of your room to tell me that.
Kendal: Yeah, you need to pick it up for me
Me: oook...

*Bedtime Battles 2*

Kendal: Mom, my radio has issues. My Bealtes are broken
(fixed radio)
Me: there, go to sleep.
Logan runs down the hall: I'm not sleepwalking this time, I am awake and I have to pee. Ooh, what is dad drilling in the kitchen? DAD!!! NEED HELP!??
go to bed people, its wine time.

*Bedtime Battles 3*

 Kendal was crying so hard (because she suddenly needed to clean the playroom at 11pm and I wouldn't let her) that she came out of her room saying she needs a towel. She said she cried an ACTUAL river and was all wet.

*Pass the Claritin*

Had an allergy attack while out shopping. Apparently I am allergic to mass quantities of Scentcy burning at the same time. (dang vendors at the consignment store) I sneezed about 50 times then my eye swelled shut. Looks like I got in a fight. Even the People of walmart looked at me funny. At least I got to hang with Chris and Beth at Houligans for a bit and was kid free for a few hours..

*We need a new pet*

I need a dog. Kendal has been eating rice crispies all week and they are EVERYWHERE.

*Real World Win of the Year*

Loopy's new employer Access Mediquip made a top 100 list for Best Companies for working families. Life is different and awesome when family comes first. 'Nothing better out there' my ass. Suck it former employers.

*Disney-isms*

Took the kids to Disney to give Loopy the afternoon off. Went to put sunblock on Kendal ..
Me: Kendal, where is your underwear?
Kendal: Oh, I just left them at home.
Me: Kendal, you are wearing a dress, you can't just leave your undies at home.
Kendal: Maybe next time..
I had extras in my purse

Got on the tram and Logan sat on the outside by the door

Me: Logan, you have to sit in the middle, kids can't sit on the end. 

Logan: Mom, remember, I am SEVEN now. That means that I am fully grown. UGH. 

They didn't ask him to move. 

Sitting in the Disney Jr. Live show
Logan: mom, those are just puppets.
Me: Now that you are fully grown you are going to have to learn to pretend to keep in magical for the younger kids.
Logan: Being grown up isn't all that fun after all.

*Crab Updates* 

So I spent the time and money to get a new crabitat going, got two more crabs, new decor, it takes up our whole couch table. 2 days later they have ALL decided to molt. I haven't seen a crab for almost 4 weeks now. Lame. Pets.

Took out the food and salt water dish to clean up a bit since they are all hiding anyway... Turbo was under the food dish in a nice big cave. I felt like I was intruding like opening an occupied bathroom... So I took a picture.

*The final countdown*

SIX DAYS UNTIL SCHOOL STARTS!!!!!!!!! Kendal is super excited, Logan is trying to talk me out of it. Thursday is meet the teachers day.

*Watch out for that*

Logan just came out of his room crying because he got "ninja-ed by his nook" that means he was reading and dropped it on his face.

*Geek talk*

Logan and Loopy are 1/2 way thought Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy. They were discussing it over dinner and I have NO idea what they are on about.

*Progress!*

Last week of summer and now the kids suddenly want to spend every moment at the pool.











The kids played Little Mermaid at the pool. Ariel (Kendal) would find treasures (leaves) at the pirate ship (fence) and have King Triton (Logan) turn her into a human or mermaid and bring it to Scuttle (me) for explanation.. once or twice the Seawitch (also me) would have to torture unfortunate souls so Ariel could fall love with Prince Eric. (Also Logan) here is prince Eric swimming to save Ariel.

*And Build, and build, and build...*

Kendal giving a tutorial of her first official Lego set. It's a tree house that has kept her occupied for DAYS. She is reading a bedtime story to her minifig.

*Take your time*

I recently read an AWESOME article on Huffington Post about taking a deep breath, slowing down, and letting your kids be kids. If you haven't read it, you should. Infact I insist that parents read this HERE. That day it took us an more than 30 min to get home from the pool. Kendal was riding her bike down the sidewalk and was afraid to fall into the grass river. Also stopped to pick up some pretty rocks and found a pencil. Don't hurry if you don't have to, enjoy the scenery and learn patience from your kids. 

*Fun with bath crayons and letters*

*Moose?*

Me: Logan, don't eat that yet. Its too hot.

Logan: I can blow on it mom, DUH!! Do I look like a MOOSE to you? 

Me: Um... no?

*First Impressions*

Logan at the school open house: Mrs. Pace, I am SO good at reading and math that I should really just skip this and be in college already.

Mrs. Pace: Ok, can you help me with my college homework then? 

Logan: Sure, what you got for me? 

Mrs. Pace I have to write a 20 page essay this weekend. 

Logan: Pass, what else?

Mrs. Pace: I think we'll get along just fine this year, Logan. 

Logan: Know why I chose that specific desk in my class? Because there is a Hannah right next to me and that's a really pretty name. I hope I get a whole table of really cute chicks. I just know I'll meet a cute chick this year.

*One last hurrah*

Final weekend getaway of the summer was brought to us by Carol Ann. We love that guy!! 

Kendal fell asleep with her Monkey and a pool noodle that she named Dino Breath.

*That other magical time of year*

Logan is throwing a temper tantrum about taking a shower. School starts tomorrow and I feel like a kid on Christmas Eve. I love my kids but OMG, I need a vacation, even if its only for 5 or 6 hours a day.

*Return of the crabs*

Mr Crabs and Foxy are back. Mr C is the one in the tree... he's redecorating.

Playing king of the climbing wall. 

Foxy won. 

*Its the most wonderful tiiiiime of the year*

Logan is off to be second grader! 

Time to wake the Kendal.

Kendal is off to be a pre-schooler! 

Kendal did fine, said she didn't need a hug and went off to play. She was a little nervous but only because one boy was freaking out. She gave him a dinosaur.







I LOVE first day of school pictures. I don't know why. I like to see how much kids grew since last year. I like to see that nervous look that they are trying to hide behind excitement.





My FAVORITE back to school picture of the year is from my friend John. We went to high school together. Then he went on to be in Drum and Bugle core and college. He was the band director at a local high school for a while. This year, he is headed back to school some more. Isn't he freakin' adorable. Love you John M!!



"First day of school, I hope the cool kids don't make fun of me for my brown paper lunch bag."

*first day report*

Kendal had a good first day. Caught a yellow ball on the playground, something about a dead fish, squashed blueberries, glued a heart to paper, and Ms. Amanda opened her yogurt smoothie wrong. Can't win em all. She was nervously chewing her hand when I got there.

Logan's report is that there are a couple cute chicks in his class. His new friend is AJ, he loves his box car (portable classroom), and they are re-sodding the P.E. field


John said he only had applesauce in his lunch and nobody wanted to trade.  Aside from that it was pretty good.  And he helped a blind girl find her class.  Good day overall

*Adapting to the schedule*

Forgot about karate until it was time to be there.. Oops. Guess I'll set an alarm on my phone for that then.

We were working on homework instead of getting ready for karate. Logan had to find 5 of his favorite things and put them in a brown bag. He chose LEGOS, pizza, video games, karate, and his new favorite book, Hitchhiker's guide.

*Spread the love*

Say what you want about hippies, but who else would notice a steal your face sticker on your rusty old car at work, burn an obscure live concert cd and leave a note asking if you want to hang out. Love this town.

*Variations on a theme*

I love Coffee. Coffee flavored ice cream, coffee flavored ecig juice. ANYthing that has caffine is ok, but coffee is my 1st choice. But you should know that this equation is pretty much heaven in my blue solo cup (cause blue was on sale) 

Cappuccino chip ice cream

+chocolate syrup

+International Delight mocha iced coffee

= Best. Homemade Milkshake. Ever. 

My friends Sarah and Jason suggested adding Kahlua or Irish Cream Both amazing ideas that will be utilized in the near future.