Why Kids Are Great

I was going to skip the last few months and just pick up where we are now. Then I had a dream the other night that all social networking was destroyed and then I realized I would have no documentation of all the funny shit my kids said for several months. *gasp*

So I'll just keep doin' what I do for my own amusement. (and yours) I KNOW I missed events and people that we saw over the holidays, but really, cut me a break. It's May.

Preparations

All packed in and ready to roll.
Hi Clowny and Elephant!!

We decided to take a family road trip to MI for Christmas and make a few stops along the way. We had a fabulous time and I am forever grateful that my kids are amazing travelers. As long as we keep moving. If we stay in one place they get cranky then want to go home.

Loopy is a rather analytical guy who needs a plan and strict record keeping. Here he is with is 'pre-flight checklist'. Sometimes if I don't laugh I'll just get pissy. We sat in the car completely loaded and ready to roll while he checked and rechecked the schedule. For like 20 minutes.

I was playing Bubble Popper Blast... Until it started talking shit so I started reading my nook instead. I've said it before and I'll say it again. my phone is an ass hole.

Kentucky Bound!

Our first stop for the night was in Kentucky. We booked a room with the intention of staying two nights because it had an indoor water park. Then I got sick and we had to change things up. This required a complete revamping of checklist, but it worked out really well. The kids LOVED it.

Our room was the one way down in the lower left corner. So when the bucket dumps it pooled outside our door. That was super loud and made me jump every time.

Fun for all ages.

Got the kids out of the pool..

Logan: I'm a wet Logan ball!

Kendal: I'm a wet Kendal ball!

Me: honey, come get your wet balls off the floor!

It was awesome until the Logan ball started smacking Loopys leg... then it got gross.

Eventually Kendal settled in for the night. All the comforts of home. She LOVES hotels

Ft. Wanye

Next stop was Ft Wayne, In. Where apparently, for the first time in recent memory, I failed to take pictures. My older brother and his family live there. Lydia is all of 3 days older than Kendal and nearly a foot taller. (no joke) Ethan is 2 and is EXACTLY like his daddy. They look alike, act alike, laugh alike. And it makes me super happy. It was rowdy and fun and the kids crashed hard. Yay for that.

MICHIGAN!!

First thing we did when we got to our hometown was jump in the car with my sister and brother in law because Baguette deFrance was calling to us. Best. Sammich. EVER

Here's proof my my coffee addiction in clearly hereditary. This is the pantry at my parents house. COFFEE EVERYWHERE. And those espresso candies are amazing. I must find some locally.

Next stop was midnight coffee with some people I miss terribly!! They made me drive and it snowed about 10 inches when we were there. I couldn't see the road all the way home. Yeah. I forgot how to drive in snow. Damnit. That was terrifying but worth it.

This is our other home base.

Christmas Eve

There was playing in the snow. It was cold. Like REALLY REALLLLY COLD.

Logan likes to shovel.

My snot was frozen

A major award!

With the help of a few friends we thought it would be fun to get my dad a full size leg lamp for Christmas. It was a couple years in the making. This is the first time in a few years that all the siblings were all home at once to really enjoy it.

Congrats again dad!!

This was the moment he realized what was going on....

Then it dawned on mom what was going on. (the pics are terrible cause my phone is an asshole.)

Thanks again to Dustin and his family for all the delivery work and to Kimi for custom making a Fragile Box, I'll have to find a picture of it and edit it in later. It was AMAZING. Best Christmas decoration at the Styf house yet!

Pillow fights and present opening.

Kendal and Uncle Bubba

Logan with Uncle Bubba

Kristen, Ethan, and Lydia

Logan with is 2 front teeth from Aunt Niki

Christmas

We went to Loopy's side of the family for Christmas dinner and MORE presents.

Loopy had the flu. This was not fun for anyone.

Out of the box for less than an hour and my kids taught the Furby to lift a leg to fart and dance to Pants on the ground. Awesome.

Logan's Loot

Survivors Club; Michigan Chapter

One of the highlights of our trip. Especially for Loopy, was meeting up with the Mich Chapter of Survivors Club. We span decades and states. Tell em how you feel kids!!

There was a Nuclear Meltdown buffalo wing eating competition. Cheryl kicked everyone's ass in this game. Ballge's lips got a little swollen and Joe couldn't talk for a while.

Then it was story time. Oh how I LOVE stories about the crazy stuff everyone dealt with over the years working at the Bad Place.

Best. Story teller. Ever.

Brad and Patti. We love her

Ballge and his sweet Fiance

Ballge with his eyes open!!

Not the Phillips 66

JOE!! We missed our Joe so much.

Yeah, I'd say that was one of the best parts of our trip. Most amazing support group there ever was.

Random stuff we did in MI

Karaoke at the Getaway

My younger brother is a karaoke DJ at a local bar. That is always a fun experience!

Me and my baby brother

Jon and Nikki

Other Karaoke people

More playing in the snow

Visiting with more friends and family

Benedicts and Mr. Wilson!

Dinner and ice cream

with Annabelle

My Gramps!

And his new beard trimmer.

It's multi-use!

Kendal got sick while we were there too,
that was miserable.

Family Portraits

As a sort of apology to my mother for the leg lamp (lets look at that masterpiece again, shall we? Its like electric sex, glowing in the window! Bask in it's glory)

Anyway, we got my mom a family portrait package from Rick Stone who happens to live right next door.

Pick a favorite. Maybe someday I'll get around to ordering prints. Although Loopy had the flu in these and Kendal was starting to crash fast.

One last sunset before we go

There is NOTHING like Lake Michigan sunsets.

The trek home

Logan HAD to see the famous lighthouse.
It was too cold to stay out and enjoy it for long.

We had planned to sleep in Chattanooga and then visit Ruby Falls. But Kendal kept getting sicker and sicker. We had to rearrange the 'return flight' checklist and head straight home. But not before finding a tunnel and telling Logan that yes, its the Chattanooga tunnel. We drove through it 6 times.

Yes, son. That is THE
Chattanooga tunnel

Sick girl

Clowny was hanging in her window all the way home. He would sort of sway/ turn to look out the window at passing cars. I am pretty sure we caused a couple accidents on the way back. Oops.

Kendal: lets go home.

Me: We are on the way.

Kendal: Well lets keep moving!

One more stop, I swear!

While we were en route, it turns out that our friends Pete and Tara had a baby! So we stopped in Atlanta for about 20mins so I could get baby snuggles. The sicklings waited out in the hall.

D'aaaawwwwwwww

Finally home!!

Aaaand at the Dr. office. A damn cool doctors office! This time we got the Egyptian room! Kendal tested positive for Flu, Logan wasn't down with the nose swab.

Logan joke of the day:
Q: What did the egyptian king say when he was lonely?
A: I want my mummy!

Loopy opening a Sarcophagus
filled with medical supplies

Kendal self medicating with
cookies and yogurt juice

Happy New Year!

Lets get in our proverbial time machine shall we?

Loopy just ordered this on a t-shirt!

Project failed

Loopy is trying to teach Logan to play guitar. This will either go really well for them or REALLY poorly. They don't have much patience for each other most of the time. Stay tuned.

*after 3 months Logan has officially learn 1 (ONE) cord.

Kendal-isms

Kendal: Mom, will you help me make the Tower or Terror ride? Its really hard! That ride makes me a little nervous.

We were at Target and Kendal was shopping in the dollar section. She found a teeny tiny little ray gun and said "Clowny told me to get one like this!" We laughed it off.. Slightly creeped out that her scary Halloween decor is requesting she purchases weapons. Later that night Logan was upstairs and thought it would be funny to kick clowny. Kendal said in a scary little voice "Use your gun, Clowny, the GUN" Its maybe starting to get a *little* weird.

Kendal is crying because she wants to play with Clowny but Pippi is hanging out with him.

Logan was SHOCKED

*Note the gun in Clowny's pumpkin

Kendal's Pre-K school picture

What the Fuck, rubber duck? =What is the function of a rubber duck?

Kendal: Grampa has found his most perfect best friend.
Me: Who?
Kendal: Gramma!

Pre-K Christmas programs. Why do parents lose all dignity and courtesy when it comes to video and pictures of their 4yr old kids picking noses, half singing, sometimes doing hand motions, and jumping up and down? They will shove, get RIGHT in front of you and hold up an IPAD to capture it all. Anyway, Here is our attempt to get pictures of Kendal's preschool Christmas program.

When its all said and done she was SO proud of herself (even if she picked her nose the whole time)

Kendal and her Teachers
Ms. Amanda and Ms. Colleen

All things Wizardry

Kendal: I would like to go Karate too. I like to take Defense Against the Dark Arts (we are still suck on Harry Potter this week.

I am pretty sure that when Logan write his vocab sentences it is being engraved somewhere on his body.. or at least he screams the whole time like that might be the case.

Kendal was watching Prisoner of Azkaban and got a little scared of the dementors. Until Loopy told her it was Clowny's brother. She's good now.

The adventures of having a Logan

2 weeks ago the guidance office called to say Logan punched a girl at school. Today they called to tell me.... wait for it.... he is being tested next week for the gifted program. Way to keep me on my toes parenthood. I hate that she waited until the end of the call to tell me why I had to come in for a conference and what we were going to discuss and sign for.

Fun fact: Logan's bus driver's last name is "Clowney" and she is "scary and mean"

This picture makes me laugh.
Looks like Michael knocked that kid out!

Logan got his yellow belt at karate. Celebrated with fro yo and pizza (in that order)

This wasn't from belt test, but the kids kicked stuff 300 times and made a pyramid
Michael would like you know to he did NOT get this from a book

Logan got grounded for being a disrespectful ass to a grown-up. I am trying to teach him that sometimes when a grown up says "because I said so" that is acceptable and you have to listen because YOU aren't a grown up. I told him he could go play outside at his friends house. Logan wanted to go into Zane's house to get a toy, Sarah (Z's mom) told him "no, cause I said so". And Logan lost his shit and wouldn't leave. She texted me, I had to go get him, he screamed all the way home. you get the idea.

After being sent to his room while me and Loopy decided the best way to handle this (he has never been that disrespectful to a grown up before) I went up to talk to him and found THIS------>

He slid it under the door like a starving captive. It had only been 5 minutes.

He was screaming unintelligibly every time I tried to talk to him so I wrote him a note about why what he did was wrong and let him know he was grounded from electronics/ TV/ Wii/ computer until we leave for Christmas Break. He was also required to write an apology letter to Ms. Sarah.. which he did... but the last sentence was "But why can't I come inside!?" He had to rewrite it.

While he was at Karate one day I went next door to Walgreens to get some coffee and Santa showed up. Immediately after karate I told Logan I am taking him to see Santa because The Big Man wasn't very happy about him getting in so much trouble this close to Christmas! He didn't believe me. And he was SO nervous.

Here he is trying to talk Santa into showing up on Christmas. He was listing off the reasons he thinks he should still get presents even though he is grounded.

Parenting Win.

Logan was having loose tooth drama all day. Thank God it came out before bed so he didn't eat this one. Pretty sure he's not going to be an ER Dr. after all, he can't handle even a drop of blood.

Logan's Joke of the Day: Why can't you play hide and seek with a mountain? Because they peak.

A day in the life (well, 2 weeks...)

It is 11pm. Why are my children in the kitchen right now? Because they are all thirsty like camels and it is URGENT.

It is 12:30am. I think a kid just fell out of bed. Sounded like it came from a top bunk. OUCH!

How I imagined it would be waking up with my kids on Saturday mornings...

How it really is waking up with my kids on Saturday mornings.

My freezer keeps defrosting itself. Meanwhile the fridge is freezing everything. This is coffee. For lunch we had frozen hummus and chip dip.

For my friends going through optometry school, please don't make your patients eyeballs look like this and then send them to pick out glasses. This has been my pet peeve since my first glasses mishap in 1st grade. Today I refused to purchase new frames because everything is bright and fuzzy. Also if you plan to dilate remind people to bring sunglasses. This has been a public service announcement.

My friend Stephanie had a baby and he is the most cuddly baby on the planet. Here she is realizing she really didn't want a beer after all, but was determined to finish it while Sarah is in snuggle baby heaven.

I love it when they love each other!

This was supposed to be a horsey ride.. Dad is the horse, Logan is the saddle, Kendal is the rider.

Me and Loopy were both in desperate need of a haircut. So Sarah came over for a house call.

Might be the last time I see this looong hair

<-----

There it is.

------->

She did an amazing job!

Preparing for a trip to the frozen tundra:

Trying on winter clothes

Kendal said she's ready to build a snowman with grampa right now! Too bad its 75 today.

Its been a while since we've worn these clothes. We need to do some shopping.

We started the packing process then went shopping for a suitcase cause we realized we don't own one.

I stared receiving scathing messages from friends in the north...

Because I posted things like this on facebook....

And because apparently it is warm enough to wear nothing but a cardboard box in December in Florida

Do you think my parents are excited to have all the kids home for Christmas!? There is a tree under there somewhere. Hopefully there is some warm clothes in those boxes!

Right before it was time to leave for our road trip I came down with a sore throat, cough, and migraine from hell that laid me out for 3 days. Anyone who knows me understands that I don't stop for such minor ailments but I was nauseous and miserable. Packing, sorting, and cleaning all stopped while I went to bed and couldn't move. I tried to tell Loopy I'd just go see Dr. Hannibal when I got to town, but Loopy would have nothing of it and made me an appt with the local guy.

To clarify, my pediatrician from MI looks like Dr. Hannibal.

<---Dr. Hines the pediatrician

Dr. Hannibal the Cannibal